Getting Diagnosed as an Adult with ASC

            Wow, my journey started 1 year and two months ago when I started reading that daredevil fanfiction. It wasn't tagged #autism, but daredevil seems to have a lot of SPD issues. The thing that mostly caught my eye was the character walking on his toes. I always walked on my toes from a very young age, I knew it was strange, but I personally didn't think anything of it. The author of this fanfiction gave a lot of resources she used in her story and I read them. I'm not sure when I got more into autism research and less into the story, but that's what happened. Suddenly I was fascinated. So many of these symptoms sounded like. Hating loud crowds, sounds. Unusual startle responses. Aversion to lights, rocking and weaving. The list could go on and on.
                 Then I got into the communicative portion of the research and I understood that I was autistic.I was reminded of my failures growing up. The bullying. The isolation. I was a social pariah. The only crowd of people I could make friends with were also people who were socially outcasted. The very first youtuber I started actively watching was Amethyst "Neurowonderful". Their videos were the key to everything. The reason I took this path at all. I suddenly knew what sensory overload was, and why at crowded restaurants i felt irritable and dizzy and tired.
                    
                       For a long time I didn't know what to do with this new found information. I asked some friends if they thought I might be on the spectrum and none of them thought so.  This was disheartening. I asked my sisters and they both agreed it was possible. My husband wasn't on my side. Most people I asked said only a professional could diagnose you, and me "self" diagnosing was problematic.  I never claimed to self diagnosed, but apparently even wondering if you might be autistic warrants the title of self diagnosed.

                     I read a book called nerdy, shy and socially inappropriate. That really confirmed how I felt. The deeper I got, the more annoyed my husband became. I discovered facebook groups and tumblr. I bought my very first fidget toys. I was on my way. It took me over a year to make my appointment because I wanted to find a place that took my insurance that also wasn't associated with autism speaks(which is hard is Texas). I also really hate to make phone calls, I forget often to make these phone calls, and I had a full-time job that didn't allow me to make phone calls on the clock. So yeah, it took me a year and 2 months to finally get to see someone. Eventually I did. I was so surprised they were versed in adult diagnosis and female presentation.
     
                   I thought that maybe my testing was too little that they didn't see enough. But in the end they did and I was diagnosed with autism along with many other comorbid mental health issues that come along for the ride like depression and anxiety.  I have self confidence I never had before.  A peace with myself my mom always told me I needed to have. This discovery in myself has changed my entire outlook on life. My thoughts are not congruent and I'm not a professional writer. I do want to write more about my life, but not in this post.

At 28.8 years of life, I was diagnosed with autism. And for now lets leave it at that.